Mom and dad came home from Utah for Rowan's 90th birthday bash. Halfway through the party, I happened upon mom as she was talking to the stake president's wife; they used to work together at the school district on the Vital Volunteer program.
Seeing the SP's wife and the stake president himself reminded mom of the Officiant Question. She pulled me aside and said" Have you asked the SP to do the ceremony?" Ah, the Moment of Truth.
I said we'd asked a Mormon friend of mine to officiate--one who also, we discovered, has a long history with Mike's family. Through her sunglasses, mom didn't exactly look pleased. At least the reveal happened in public--no scenes. I said we were very happy to have Mark doing the ceremony and he's tickled to be doing it.
Mom asked whether Mark would be dignified about doing the ceremony. I reassured her that he would be.
I wonder if she was worried about the ceremony turning out like my friends Marilyn & Chester's wedding. The bride and groom both wore ape costumes and red Converse high tops, the minister was dressed as a ringmaster, and the guests came in costume. I wore a stunning handmade orange vinyl carrot costume with green pipe cleaner fronds. It was one of the funnest weddings I've been to.
No, mom. Rest assured no one will be dressed as a giant carrot at MY wedding. (Sigh.)
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7 comments:
or so you think.....
Who said that...Kelly?
Or maybe Wendy?
(Although I think I'm justified in suspecting the future sister-in-law who buried my shoes at the beach last summer...)
speaking of the wedding - let me be the first to say your invitations are lovely!! received mine in the mail today - i'm sure no one will mistake hats and vintage attire for carrot costume...
that second anonymous was from Hevansrich in the OC - my blogger password is but a distant memory...
ME, you have the patience of Job. I think Mark is a lovely and appropriate choice. Your mother is forgetting one--no two--very important facets here.
First, this is your day, not her day.
Second, continually questioning you about who will officiate is more of an indictment on her and the fact that she doesn't trust or believe she raised you in such a manner that you would take these kinds of things into consideration than it is on you. Sure, you might really, really, really want the ape suits and the carrot costume, but you also want your mom and dad there, so you've respectfully declined the King Kong/Bugs Bunny theme in favor of something more--shall we say--traditional?
I deal with similar issues with my mother and sister. When we went to Utah for her dad's funeral, they both had a list of do's and don't's for me. I finally put a stop to it all by saying, "don't you trust that you raised me in such a way that I can put aside my own preferences and will behave in a manner that shows I respect you?"
Having said that, that doesn't mean I was 100% cookie cutter perfect. Hell, I slipped and called my cousin "Jack" a damn ass in the foyer of the LDS church! Oops!
As for me, after all the pictures are taken, I'm breaking out my tuxedo and going totally butch on you! (Oh, wait, this day isn't about me. Never mind. I'll behave.)
I'm sure Mark will handle things so well that even mom won't be able to object.
If the subject comes up again--which it might--I may borrow your line about trust.
I called bullshit on someone in the chapel (loudly with lots of people nearby) and lived to tell about it. I bet you weren't the only one thinking the cousin was being a jackass.
You have my blessing to go as butch as you want before, during and after the wedding!
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